No One CAN Do It FOR You… And Even if They Could…

Most “do-it-for-you” programs don’t work. Why? Are they bad? Are they fakes, thieves, or is there something in our design as human beings that prevents us from taking advantage of these opportunities. This is what this article is about. Surprising. Documented. True.

No One CAN Do Anything FOR You… And Even if They Could…

Surprising title, isn’t it? Especially from an Internet Marketer and Coach. After all, the best product to sell is something that you do for them, right?

Yes and no.

Everyone hopes that what they need can and will be done for them. So, as an Internet Marketer I can make a buttload of cash by promising that.

But here is the kicker: No one really appreciates what they get ready. Why? Are they unappreciative? Do they lack the genes for appreciation? Do they have the habit of it?

No.

If we take what Kabbalah* says about how it all works, especially what is the inner motivator of every human being: to develop one’s Self to the fullest in a lifetime by correcting the areas where they fall short from fully being their divine (giving) nature… every time someone does something FOR you, they rob you of the opportunity to do it for your Self… because the thing looks done.

Last year I participated in a cca. 6-month program that had two parts in it: 1. it promised to wipe away all negativity in my nature 2. it promised to teach me to live consistently with this cleaned divine vehicle of myself, so now that it is not hindered by the negativity, it can become a super boosted accomplishing machine bringing me riches, happiness, relationship bliss, a thin and supple body, bountiful energy, fame, fortune, whatever your heart desires.

I went into this program with a mixture of doubt, suspicion, and hope in my heart. I wanted the program mostly to get rid of the anxiety attacks, the feelings of inferiority and worthlessness that enveloped me like a dark cloud.

I wanted to experience being worthy of living on this beautiful planet, worthy to contribute to people, and worthy of happiness… all of which have eluded me in the past.

I had weekly conversations with six of the other participants for whom I was like a mentor. I gained insights I hadn’t had, into what people wanted most.

I saw that people wanted their spiritual work done for them. They were willing to do hocus pocus, some mechanical self protection like visualization, affirmations, but not their spiritual work.

Spiritual work is being willing to face what is dark about you, confront it, and attempt to restrict it and weed it out of your nature.

No one can do it for you. People can be there to listen, to support you while you are doing it, but can’t do the digging.

It is similar to digging for gold: you need to remove a lot of dirt. And while you are doing that, it is a good idea to have someone hold the dirt, so that you can concentrate your efforts on removing new dirt, not the same one over and over again. When you ruminate in your head, engaging in monologue, what you are doing is turning over the same dirt… that is why having someone to listen actively, so you can get to new dirt is so important.

I had two psychologists do psychoanalysis with me. The only thing they had in common was that the therapy was expensive and totally worthless. They made no input and I came to no conclusion: it was like I played with my poo-poo for years… and I also paid for it with real money.

On the other hand, in a program I took over a weekend some years ago, in a “paired” exercise, I could glimpse at something like gold, right underneath the darkness… and I never needed therapy again. The difference was that the other of the pair listened with the intention to reveal something, and so I did. What I revealed set me free in a big way.

But first it appalled me, disgusted me, mortified me… but ultimately it set me free.

Anyway, let’s get back to the question, why wouldn’t you appreciate what is done for you.

Your soul doesn’t like handouts. Your soul doesn’t want to just receive. Your soul want to live consistent with its divine nature, and therefore it will refuse any deal that is about receiving only.

Also, your soul is interested in experiencing, good and bad, bitter and sweet, painful and blissful, failure and success, and would rather not have any of it handed to it on a silver platter.

Your soul wants to work on its correction through those experiences. Everything else feels like “bread of shame” that it didn’t earn.

And even when your ego wants it done for it, the soul with make you sabotage it, and you’ll lose that gain that the “gift” has bought you. Just look at lottery millionaires… without exception they lose it all.

Now you have it. That is why no one can do it for you.

But one could offer doing it WITH you, supporting through the stops, the barriers, the hurdles, every step of the way.

This is what I am about. I have overcome more hurdles than most, and know how to overcome them, allowing your soul to do its work. That is what’s special about me.

Don’t misunderstand me, me ego wants to give it to you and move to the next chomp… but my soul won’t let me. Thank G-d. This way you have someone to support you to get everything you ever wanted.

Including Internet Marketing Success.

Internet Marketing Case Study Part 1

Let me start with a little story:

There was once a farmer who had a donkey. The donkey was a real pain, it kicked and it bit…

One day the donkey fell into a well that was not in use.

The farmer tried to pull up the donkey from the well, but he did not succeed. He called for help and a few of his neighbors came, but even together they could not pull out the poor donkey.

The farmer had a change of heart and decided that the donkey was old, and it had only been trouble, so they will be all better off if they just bury the donkey. They will get rid of the old well and the donkey at the same time.

So they started to fill the well with dirt, one shovelful at a time.

The donkey, every time the dirt hit his back, shook himself and stepped up a little, on the top of the dirt. After half an hour or so, to the amazement of the farmers, the donkey stepped out of the hole and ran away. But before he ran, he bit the farmer well.

This story will play out well… in the following case study.

I will be painfully honest in this series of articles. It will be painful to me, because I will be admitting to some of my weaknesses. And it may be painful to some other marketer, who I decided not to mention by name, but he will recognize himself.

Now, the painful part: I have been in internet marketing, unconsciously and consciously, for 12-13 years.

I started by turning an offline wildly successful local magazine into an online venture, mainly because 1. printing was too expensive, 2. my health didn’t make it easy for me to work that hard any longer, go to clubs, deliver magazines, go, go, go, work work work.

I didn’t know I was in marketing. I was a publisher. I didn’t know my main job was marketing, so I knew nothing about marketing. I did some stuff that I now consider marketing, but then… I didn’t even have the word. I thought marketing was focus groups, and I despised that then.

So I didn’t make any money, and only after quite a few years I started to make a full time income. By full time I mean I could pay the bills and eat. I mean I didn’t have to have another job.

About five years ago I heard the word marketing in a different context, and this time it sounded like that is maybe what I should be doing… if I knew how to do it.

I started to study, but could not see how it applied to what I was already doing.

I learned that if I could build a mailing list, I could start to make more money than just paying the bills.

I met Tellman at the Underground Internet Marketing Seminar at breakfast, and shared with him. When he found out what kind of traffic my site had, he went ballistic. He was sure I was sitting on a million dollar goldmine. Everyone had always thought that, but all I could eke out is a meager living.

He told me exactly how to build a mailing list, then went his merry way. I tried. I failed at it.

I hired this coach for six months, that coach for six months… some increase, but still no mailing list.

Then I had a brainstorm, and managed to build a list of 278, fans, lovers of what I had to say, not buyers.

By that time I was successful with affiliate marketing in the self-improvement field, became good at ppc, could teach what to do (like a good basketball coach… not good at throwing baskets, lol), still no list.

In July of this year I took on a fellow bumbling, fumbling wannabe. I spoke authoritatively, so she trusted that I’ll be able to guide her to make money.

She had few skills, little knowledge, so I decided that I’ll teach her, but I’ll use the energy of the relationship to fuel me to get through the stopping points, the rough spots, the walls I hadn’t been able to go through. I wanted to scale high walls, I wanted to jump over big canyons… I wanted to become the basketball coach who can throw baskets. I wanted to become the internet marketing coach that made money doing internet marketing.

Continued in Part 2

Internet Marketing Case Study Part 2

… Go to the beginning of the article…

As I said at the end of Part 1: I wanted to become an internet marketing coach that made money DOING internet marketing.

Diana’s job was to help me, just by being there, so I become unstoppable. I knew that if I didn’t stop when it was hard, if I didn’t stop when something failed, if I didn’t stop when I didn’t know what else to do, then ultimately I would get where I was heading: making at least a million dollars a year in internet marketing.I wrote out a check for 100K to my favorite cause, signed it, and put it on my refrigerator door.

I told my closest friends, my little brother, and my spiritual teacher what I was planning.

Warning: some of what I say next is going to be hokey, woowoo, etc. to you. Please stay with me, it will be short, and you can get the story without getting my spiritual explanation. And the story, the case study is worth reading, I promise.

Then the bottom fell out. The Dark Side of my nature started to put up a fight.

Monies that were coming in steadily, started to come in drops, dribbles.

Diana’s income source died.

I knew I was attempting a major overhaul of my life. That amount of resistance from the Dark Side indicated that. I was overjoyed. I must be on the right path, I must be doing what I am supposed to do.

We tried the usual things, but nothing looked like a good path. We bought some products, but the spark didn’t ignite.

Then, at the darkest, I received an email from a marketer whose offers I have bought before.

I read it, and knew that it was the answer to my prayers.

The offer was: buy a lot of leads of people who requested money making information, and they will also set you up with a site from where you can mail them, and even an optin page and an upsell… Sweet deal.

It was cheap. The whole deal was inexpensive. I bought 4 times the amount of leads. The leads were to be delivered in five days.

I aroused Diana and infected her with hope.

We were going to make it rich. 15,000 strong instant mailing list.

But what are we going to sell? We got to work. We scoured our hard drives for plr products, and found more than 200 of them. Then we evaluated, and created pages, audios, rewrote, salesletters, emails, the whole nine yards.

We changed direction a few times, and it took us three weeks to be ready to mail…

Continued in Part 3

Internet Marketing Case Study Part 3

>>> go to the beginning of the article

As I said in the previous part, we were ready to mail.

We added 2K leads that Diana got from another source, so now we had 17K hungry prospects… right?

I decided to “clean” the list before we start to bombard them with frequent emails.

I imported the data into a database program called Filemaker Pro (I used to be a Mac person… back in my paper publishing days, :-), the Filemaker is a Claris program…)

Anyway, Filemaker can email personalized email through your own email client, like Outlook Express, or in my case, The Bat, and the recipient’s ISP won’t know it is not a hand sent, personal email.

I have 3 gmail accounts, each with 500 sends limit a day, 5 yahoo premium accounts, each with 250 sends limit a day, we’ll get through this mailing in a few weeks, but by then we’ll have, as I hoped, no, strike that, expected 300 buyers, which could be the seed of a great business. Right?

First I was segmenting the data by ISP. Gmail is an ISP. Yahoo is an ISP. Hotmail is and ISP. Aol is an ISP.

I found only 175, circa 10% gmail accounts. 100 of them came from Diana’s 2,000. Hmmm. Interesting. In my experience, any internet marketing list has at least 30% gmail emails… and it is also my experience, that gmail is the most deliverable email address given google’s very good spam filter that does not catch many legitimate emails as spam.

8161 yahoo,
813 hotmail
221 aol

I emailed the yahoo people from my yahoo accounts.

The rest of them I emailed from my gmail accounts.

I am exactly half way through. I have had 2134 undeliverables (about 25%). 90% of the hotmail accounts were returned undeliverable. Verizon: ditto. Bellsouth: ditto.

No gmail was returned.

I have changed the email I sent every day…

As a test, I posted one email as an article on my blog, and it attracted 78 visitors that came to read that article from bookmarking services.

I expect that I’ll chuck the whole 17108 leads… I won’t even bother removing the bad emails… why bother.

I paid $400 for the list. I have wasted more money before…

I have an option to be resentful, to be depressed, to grieve my losses, to demand my money back, or be grateful for the sudden injection of urgency that helped me over some barriers I could never get over before.

I have finally become good at using Dreamweaver. I have finally set up my account correctly with 2checkout. I have seen my way through a funnel system that can and will make money, as soon as I drive real prospects to it.

I have become clear about what I need to get better at:

writing sales copy, both salespages and email.

Crafting an offer

Credibility… why they should buy from me

What’s unique about me. Half of the time I was trying to be someone else, other than myself. I thought modeling meant trying to be that other person, the successful one, because I am not successful because I am me…

I got really clear for myself that no one can be coached who is not in action. I am now sure that the only kind of person I want to coach in the future who is attempting to do something and needs my coaching and teaching.

I am immensely grateful. I spent the best 400 dollars I have ever spent. Including everything. Because it has brought me to a place from where I can see. And I didn’t even know that I was in a deep hole trying to see beyond the walls of the hole. Those 400 bucks brought me up to see out of the hole…

I am looking to spend the next 400 bucks to put me on a mountain… Any suggestions? :-)

Remember the donkey story from Part 1 of this case study?

Be the donkey… indomitable spirit.

PS: I’ll put all the findings in a follow up as soon as I have it. Stay tuned.

Will You Succeed or Will You Fail in Internet Marketing?

When you ask people what made them who they are today, invariably all of them answer a version of the same thing: The past.

How they express this varies: my parents, my schooling, what I have been doing, my genes, etc. etc. but all in all, they all mean the same: what makes me who I am today is the past.

If that were true, that would be bad news, really.

Imagine that it is true. Now see yourself trying to be successful online. Given your track record, and your genes, and your past behavior, how much chance do you have for success?

I’d love to say zero, but it would be unfair to many of you. So instead, I answer it in a way that applies to all of you:

The same as yesterday. Or a year ago…

Now, that is a total bummer, isn’t it?

And it is total hogwash. It is a lie. It is an illusion.

If that were true, no change would be possible. And people do change. Not many, not often, but they do.

If change weren’t possible, then…

People would not suddenly become winners, they would never move out of their current predicament.

Jim Edwards would still be living in a trailer park delivering newspapers every morning. Probably alone, because his wife would not have put up with it this long… :-)

Mike Littman would still be working at a local store selling wares, live in a rented room, and would not be a celebrated coach and entrepreneur.

I would be still depressed every day and bemoan my portion in life.

I would give you more examples, but I want to go on with this… this is so important.

If your past gives your who you am today, then you am screwed… so maybe it is the circumstances that give you the chance or no chance for success, isn’t that true?

Maybe, let’s look: Have you ever read the statistics about lottery winners? They all felt that the winnings destroyed their lives. They spent or lost the money they won in two-six years, and were worse off than they were before the winnings.

So what is the truth about this?

Who you are being, at any moment, is given by the future you live into.

What do I mean by that? If your mindset is that of a pauper, your mind will make sure continue living like a pauper.

If your mindset is that of a millionaire, you can lose everything and it will come back to you faster than you made your first million.

But how do you know what your mindset is? Answer: look around you, look at your life, and see what you have, what you do, who you hang out with. They all come from your mindset.

Oh no, Sophie, that is bad news. So how do I change that? I want to be rich, live the easy life… how can I get that?

My answer to this: change the future you live into.

Easier said than done.

Most people think they can do it once, and then it is all done… but you must create an appealing future many times, every day, for the rest of your life, if you want the change to stick.

Because it is very true that the past has a hold on your future, and it is not very willing to let go.

A friend of mine got very ill a few years ago. She had no idea it had anything to do with her until one day a kindly massage therapist suggested that she avoids any negativity in her environment, including talking daily to her excessively negative mother. Including watching television. Including reading the newspaper.

She made that sacrifice, and she got well.

But the past and negativity is catching up with her nowadays: I read her emails and she is always pissed about something, hates something else… how long is she going to stay well, physically and financially?

My prediction is: not long, if she doesn’t catch herself. And FAST.

She used to have a daily ritual to put herself in a winning state of mind, and she has been slacking off. Or maybe she started to talk to her mother… or some other negative folks… students maybe?

Anyway, what you want to be left with is this: Change the future you live into and you can change yourself into a person who can and will have that future. Then you can buy an internet marketing program and suck out every juicy benefit… and make more money with it… instead of having it collect dust on your shelf or hard drive… Do you know what I am talking about?

I am a master at helping people change their mindset… while I guide you in YOUR business.

I have unique programs where people start a new business and I coach them through it while having plenty of opportunity to change their mindset. My next coaching program will be starting in a few weeks.

This program is not right for everyone who is interested in it, and I only take people for whom it is right.

If you would like to have a personal phone call with me to see if you are eligible, if there is a fit for you, please email me at

mavencentral@gmail.com and I’ll find a suitable time through email correspondence…

I hope to speak with you soon.

In the meantime, I have a gift for you:

go to http://www.cashmachines4u.com/10steps

Go and get it.

Talk to you soon,

Sophie Maven Central